I haven’t tried heroin and honestly hope I never do.
Meth is like, I dunno, the first time I tried it was like wow, that shivery amazing feeling washing over you so that I’d literally be gasping for breath. That exhilarating feeling lasted for the first month or two before I started to build a tolerance.
The high itself is mostly just a lot of energy. You get a lot of enthusiasm about everything you talk about; you get some confidence perhaps; for me it was like the energy of VAST amounts of speed with some distorted form of the pleasure of MDMA.
But there’s the downsides. Paranoia is the worst; realising that you’re being paranoid but believing it anyway, and it carries over into your sober life. Dreading the come down: I would literally start crying the minute I was alone. Feeling so physically exhausted you wanted to throw up but being unable to sleep. It also destroyed my enjoyment of pretty much all other drugs, not because it’s better but because it’s all I can think about.
None of these things happened at the start. At the start I just felt great, partied hard, dealt with the comedowns easily. By the end I was needing more and more gear, not getting the same high, finding myself using when I’d said I wouldn’t, and hating myself for it. Furthermore, people congratulate me for getting clean and underestimate how fucking hard it was. They also don’t realise that their congratulations are premature: I know people who stayed clean for years before relapsing HARD so I might not even be safe from it yet.
Sorry I know you asked what the high was like but highs and lows go hand in hand and I’d hate you to be misinformed. If I could offer any advice, drop an acid tab instead and thank me later.
Champions of the dugout dance.
Corey Turner by Wong Sim